To Rome with Love: 3.5 Stars

Bathroom Meter: 3.5 out of 5 stars. (Or 4 stars if you’re one of the few who can stand listening to Woody Allen’s voice for two hours.)

“I just don’t get it. I don’t understand. Why would anyone find me annoying?”

A comedy about several different visitors and residents of Rome, Italy, and the adventures and romances they get into.

Have I sat down to watch it? No. I don’t think I ever will.

Have I theater-watched it? Yes, I’ve seen the entire movie in bits and pieces.

Main Audience Demographic: PEOPLE WHO LOOK AND TALK LIKE WOODY ALLEN. Seriously, even the women are his doppelgangers. This phenomenon is widely noted, and known as the “Woody-Double Syndrome.”

Audience reaction as they leave the theater: People come out smiling and laughing. They like this film, but most of them are already Woody Allen fans, so keep that in mind.

Best comment: “That was really funny!”

Worst comment: “It was OK.”

See it or not? Sure. It’s certainly not even on the same plane as Midnight in Paris, so don’t go in expecting something as clever and refreshing as that film. To Rome with Love is more of a series of absurd moments and absurd characters, all thrown together in an absurd way.

Certain storylines are much funnier than others (the opera singing funeral director is priceless) but certain characters are so obnoxious you’ll want to run to the bathroom just so you don’t have to hear them talk anymore.

(The most annoying character in the history of all characters)

Overall,  you’ll get some good laughs out of it. But don’t expect all the random storylines to fit together in some brilliant way at the end. You will be sorely disappointed.

Just think of the film as a series of sketches about seriously neurotic people hanging out in Italy.

“Did she just call me neurotic? Did she just call me NEUROTIC??”

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